Interview with Tristan Taormino about her Guide to Kinky Sex for Couples

What is your favorite part/scene from the movie Tristan Taormino’s Guide to Kinky Sex for Couples?

It’s impossible for me to pick a favorite, so I’ll just tell you what I loved about one particular scene in the film between Asa Akira and Derrick Pierce. Derrick is an incredible dominant, and his interview really speaks to how thoughtful he is about what it means to do a dominant/submissive roleplay. He’s smart and thinks a lot about what his partner wants and how to craft a scene to give her a particular experience. So, I feel like aspiring dominants can learn a lot from him. Asa is obviously a major star in the adult industry, but she’s also really down to earth and embodies a powerful submissive who knows what she wants. Together in their scene, their chemistry was just off the charts. I’ve seen Derrick turned on before because I’ve worked with him many times, but there was a heat to this pairing that everyone in the room felt.guide to kinky sex for couples

Any funny or interesting behind the scenes stories/moments?

Massage oil candles are one of my favorite toys that we feature in the movie, and Danny Wylde and Lyla Storm use one in their scene. As part of their roleplay, Danny decided to make a game out of it and balance the candle, which is in a tin container, on Lyla’s back and tell her she couldn’t move very much or the candle might fall over and spill. It was a cool element, entirely unscripted, but it totally worked. Danny teased her about it, and it built anticipation and tension. Then, after he poured the hot wax on her skin and rubbed it in, they both got caught up in the moment. He started to fuck her and they were really into it. Danny distractedly sort of moved the candle, which was still lit, to one side on the bed. All I could think was, um, if that slides even a little, the sheets are going to catch on fire! So I swooped in and grabbed the candle. They were in their own world and blissfully unaware that there was still an open flame right next to them. Luckily, there was no fire and they just kept going!

You’ve now directed numerous sex education “guides.” Which are you most proud of (or like the most)? Why?

I feel like I learned so much and really honed my vision as I developed the Vivid-Ed line, so I’m most proud of some of my later films because I think they really represent my mission and intentions. The Expert Guide to Female Orgasms and The Expert Guide to Pegging: Strap-on Anal Sex for Couples are my two favorites. I love the diversity of scenes in The Expert Guide to Female Orgasms and how they all come together. It’s also jam packed with sex ed information as really wonderful interviews with performers. I’ve done many movies about anal sex, but The Expert Guide to Pegging: Strap-on Anal Sex for Couples is really close to my heart. I pushed some of the boundaries of typical mainstream porn depictions of pegging, and broke new ground. Each couple has great chemistry, which makes for scorching hot scenes so it accomplishes my goal of informing and arousing viewers.

guide to kinky sex for couplesWhat is your favorite part of the filmmaking process?

My favorite part is working with performers. I truly value their input in the filmmaking process, and I don’t always know what’s going to happen because I allow things to unfold organically. So, it’s really exciting to watch as performers develop authentic chemistry, things happen spontaneously, or a scene goes in an unexpected direction. I always have a plan and a vision, and something always happens that surprises me. When we were shooting Tristan Taormino’s Guide to Kinky Sex for Couples, in the middle of the scene, Aiden Starr said to Christian that she’d make him come on command. I was thinking to myself, “Can he do that?” He was really focused on pleasing her since she was the dominant. And he did it!

Do you have any kinky sex tips or advice that you want to share that didn’t make it into the movie?

The movies cover a lot of ground, especially for folks who are new to BDSM and kink. The most important advice I can give people is to use the scenes as inspiration, but not duplicate them. There is no one way to have kinky sex. The idea is to find your own voice and style; build a scene around what the two of you want to do, not what you think you should do.

What would you say is the biggest change in adult films in the last 5 years? 

There has been a tremendous amount of change in the adult industry in the past five years. The emergence of tube and bit torrent sites that make pirated content available for sharing is destroying the old economic model of the adult industry. It’s getting more and more difficult to get consumers to pay for porn. But I’m convinced that if I create unique, quality movies that offer something different than the majority of what’s out there, I can continue to do well in this industry. I think that there has been a boom in the demand for romance movies, especially in light of the success of Fifty Shades of Grey. Tristan Taormino’s Guide to Kinky Sex for Couples combines education, kink, and romance, which sets it apart from other movies.

Which do you like most—writing, directing, or speaking? Why?

I do have a lot of different jobs. Whether I am writing a book, directing a film, speaking at a college, teaching a workshop, or hosting my radio show, to me, it all falls under the heading of sex educator. So, my favorite part of my job is teaching. I love to share my knowledge and enthusiasm for a subject to help people discover new erotic territory. It’s incredibly gratifying to me when people write and say, “You’ve changed my sex life for the better!”

guide to kinky sex for couples