In our second to last post in our “Kits under $50” series, we’re stepping into a darker side of the sex toy world. BDSM has got a lot of publicity lately, and there are a lot of couples who are exploring the use of pain in their bedrooms as a sexual stimulus. This is one of those areas where you need to start slowly, and educate yourself as you progress through various levels of play. You also want to stay within a budget, as some couples may decide it’s not for them. Looking to pick up some S&M toys for the first time? Here’s our selection of beginner tools for pain play under $50.

Flat Paddle – price range $17 to $33

The ruler that the naughty schoolgirl gets across her back side or the back of a hairbrush that the misbehaving slave gets a smack from – these are all domestic versions of a classic paddle. Paddles are one of the best tools for beginner spankers to use as there’s 100% control over how soft (or hard) you wield the tool. Basic rule of thumb is the larger the paddle, the less sting is felt. Basic paddles like the Smackers Triple Kisser Paddle always have an easy to grip handle, and often have a loop at the end to wrap around your wrist.

Flogger – price range $17 to $30

You may look at a flogger and think it’s called a whip – the two terms are often interchanged. Floggers tend to have multiple strips of fabric (known as the ‘fall’) attached to a single handle. Some advanced floggers can cost you more than $200, but basic versions like the Tantric Satin Pleasure Whip will cost you less than $20. Don’t go full force with these at first – get to know your toy as each has their own qualities that make the line between pleasure and pain its own.

Nipple clamps – price range $3 to $30

This is one of those S&M toys that you can actually pick up from your local store. Many lovers use clothes pins as their first set of nipple clamps. If you are going down that route, we suggest getting the style with a wider ‘pinching’ area, and not the 100-to-a-pack wooden ones. For those who would rather have more control over the pain, adjustable clamps like the Feathered Nipple Clamps have screws that limit how close the two ends of the clamp can come together.

Riding crop – price range $13 to $50

Riding crops aren’t just for pony play – they are a foundation piece in almost every BDSM toy chest. Crops are rather standard in design and shape, with only the quality of materials separating the lower end price range from those that will cost you three figures. Low end crops like the Adam & Eve Apple Top Crop will do the job just as well as their more expensive partners, even if it doesn’t ‘look’ as fetish as the others.

Bulb-style Penis Pump – price range $20 to $30

You don’t want to get a huge pump with all the ‘bells and whistles’ for your first few tries with a penis pump. You may find that pumps don’t give you the effect you’re looking for, so rather than waste a hundred dollars on a pump, stick with something basic. The hand powered bulb used in the most basic penis pumps is similar to what you see on blood pressure cuffs. Rather than adding air to a cuff with each press of the bulb, you are removing air from the tube, creating a vacuum. A&E Beginner’s Power Pump is a very basic unit with just the features that a beginner needs.

Basic cock rings – price range $3 to $15

So now that you have an erection you’re happy with, how do you keep it? You need to find a way to keep all the blood that you just pumped into your penis from flowing back out to your body too quickly. Cock rings will do this! The most basic cock rings are simple plastic circles that you slide down your shaft to the base of your member. The slight constriction it creates helps keep the blood where you want it to be! We suggest getting a set of various sizes, like the Ultra Cocksweller Cock Rings, so you are sure you get a snug fit.

Replacement pump sleeves – price range $10 to $15

At the base of many styles of penis pump is a latex or other flexible plastic sleeve that ensures an air-tight seal around the penis. After repeated uses, this sleeve can stretch out and not fit around the shaft properly. Because they’re thin as well, they can sometimes rip. Rather than spending $20 on a new pump, you can get new sleeves like the Replacement Pump Sleeves at Adam and Eve that will help your pump last a bit longer before you move on to more expensive models.

Water based lubricant – $5 to $12

Lubing up the penis before starting your pumping action will not only make it easier to get the pump on to begin with, it’ll also make sliding the cock ring down quicker. You’ve also got a pre-lubed penis when it comes time for intercourse as well! As most pump sleeves are latex based, you need to stay away from oil and silicone based lubes – so stay away from baby oil and petroleum jelly. Silicone lubricants will also break down the latex. A thick water based lube like Astroglide will work perfectly.

Bondage Tape – price range $11 to $15

You may look at this and think, “Eleven bucks for tape? Why not just use duct tape?” Some experienced Dominants and submissives do, once they understand the mechanics of using it. For beginners, tape made specifically for use on human skin, like the Sex & Mischief Bondage Tape is a much safer alternative. Most bondage tape doesn’t actually have any adhesive and uses the qualities of the materials that it’s made from to stick to itself. This also means it is reusable, saving money over time. Bondage tape can not only be used to retrain the body, it can also double as a blindfold or mouth gag.

Tie Restraints – price range $15 to $23

The most basic restraints there are consist of a length of cloth, sometimes using two different textures of materials for either side of the tie. Moving beyond what you can get at your local craft shop, tie restraints like the Black Rose Rosie Restraints incorporate loops into their design so you don’t need to worry about tying or untying knot. This lets you concentrate on other aspects of your session, as well as leaving the scissors behind!

Handcuffs – price range $8 to $30

Your stereotypical metal police handcuffs are usually found in almost every BDSM kit around. Even “vanilla” lovers sometimes have cutsie versions with pink fur and plastic rings. Pastic cuffs are great for bachelorette parties and gag gifts, but not so much in the bedroom when using them for actual restraint. If you’re looking for something with a bit more ‘oomf’, the Fetish Fantasy Handcuffs have the standard key and lock setup, but also have a quick release switch that way if the kids come knocking, untying Daddy is a quick job.

Blindfold – price range $5 to $20

This is one area that we think that you don’t necessarily need to buy a “bondage” styled item in order to get good value for money. You can pick up a standard sleeping eye mask at any department store for a few bucks. One of our writers has a whole collection of them at home from goodie bags on trans-Atlantic flights! If you do want to splash out and get something a bit more durable, Adam and Eve carry an Animal Blindfold that has a rather wild design on the front. Leather lovers may appreciate Fetish Fantasy’s Leather Love Mask, albeit at a higher price than the standard sleep masks.

Desensitizing lubricant – price range $7 to $13

Lube is the key to a successful anal training! Desensitizing lubricants have additional ingredients that help numb the skin around  the anus. This has both a physical and psychological effect, as the less pain you are experiencing the less tense you will make your body. This relaxes the anal opening, allowing easier penetration. Many anal training lubes come in tubes, but others, like the Moist Anal Lube, come in a spray form. This is one of the few cases where silicone lubricant may be a better option than a water based one, as long as the toys you use are not made from silicone, and you aren’t using a condom. Silicone lubes tend to last longer for repeated penetrations, and are thicker.Slim sided anal plug – price range $10 to $13

The very first toy you should start with for anal training are narrow, straight sided butt plugs with a flared base, like the Glow Slim Butt Plug. The narrow tip to these toys is easier to insert than a standard sized dildo, and the straight sides help keep a continual pressure on the anus when penetrating. The flared based makes it easy to control the plug, whether you’re doing the training solo, or your lover is helping you along. You can buy sets of anal plugs like this in gradually increasing sizes, if you want to go as slow and steady as possible.

Flare sided anal plus – price range $10 to $18

Once you are ready to move on from straight sided anal plugs, the next step is to move onto the more traditional flared sided plugs. These can sit inside the body easier, as the anus ‘holds’ onto the base of the toy while the larger bulb remains inside the body. Like the slim sided plugs, it’s better to start small – like with the Corked Butt Plug – and work your way up. Again, flared bases are preferable to those without a base, as it’s easier to control and remove when desired.

Connected anal beads – price range $10 to $25

Some beginners in the anal sex world prefer to start with anal beads rather than a dildo. They are smaller, and give a sense of ‘relief’ once one has been inserted before moving onto the next. Beginners may prefer to use single molded units of beads like the Sassy Anal Beads, as they are easier to remove. They then move onto the “stringed” style once they are happy with their anal training progress.

Modular or Ring Based Harness – price range $25 to $35

If you’re looking at strapons for the first time, there are two routes you can go down. One is harnesses that have the dildo built in. These are fixed units that are not interchangeable. We suggest, though, for ladies who are just starting out – spend a bit more and get a modular system, as it will save you money in the long run. Peg-based systems like the Vac-U-Lock Deluxe Strap-On Harness open you up to a wide selection of attachments without having to buy a new harness each time. O-ring systems like the Fetish Fantasy Elite Beginner’s Harness don’t tie you down to a particular brand of sex toy, but you need to be sure that every attachment that you buy will fit into the harness.

Flared-Bottom Dildo – price range $15 to $20

If you’re going to get a dildo for a harness, unless you go with a Vac-U-Lock style dildo, you’re best off getting a dildo with a flared base. Straight dildos will not hold as secure in an o-ring style based. Some dildos have a set of “balls” that will hold the dildo in place, like the Z 5 5” Flexi Cock, while others have non-anatomical base like the 6 Inch All American Super Flexible Dong. Whichever you choose, you should always take note of the diameter of the toy to be sure that it will not only fit into the o-ring on your harness, but will remain in place when it is strapped in.

Or…a Harness and Dildo set – price range $27 to $40

If you’re looking for simplicity, and would like to spend a bit less up front, there is the option of a fixed dildo and harness set. The dildos in these sets are not interchangeable – while this limits the style of dildo and harness, it also removes the need to buy separate parts or be sure the accessories will fit. The Hollow Strapon For Him Or Her is an affordable starter dildo. If you prefer an interchangeable set, Vac-U-Lock does come in sets with the dildo and harness already included, but these typically cost more than $50.

Water Based Lube- price range $5 to $12

Once again, water based lube is showing up on our must-get list! While not all dildos are silicone based, there may be the chance going down the line that you’ll pick up a silicone dildo for your strapon harness. Since silicone lubricants will break down the materials in silicone dildos, you’re better stocking up on water based lubes. (It’s also easier to clean out of cloth based harnesses!)

Vibrating Penis Ring – price range $11 to $16

One of the more unassuming sex toys for guys is the penis ring. These little plastic circles aren’t just for the BDSM crowd, and aren’t designed as punishment for a naughty man. Penis rings have a number of purposes, including making the member harder for a longer period of time. Slightly more advanced than the standard model, vibrating penis rings can not only stimulate the man wearing it, but add something for their female lover as well. Built in small bullet vibrators like the one in the First Time Love Ring can stimulate a nearby clit.

Basic Male Masturbator – price range $6 to $20

For the guys who are going it alone, or their partners who want to play along, male masturbators are a great little piece of equipment to enhance the basics hand job. For the basic starter units, the male masturbator often resembles a tube with an opening. Made from the same materials as a lot of dildos, they mold themselves against the skin and move along with the upwards and downwards motions. For starters, it’s a good idea to get a male masturbator with an opening at each end like the Good Head Stroker, as it makes cleanup easier.

Water Based Lubricant – price range $5 to $12

Especially when using male masturbators, lube is a must. To be sure that your toy is compatible with the lube, we suggest playing it safe and going with a water based option. Not only can you use it for your sex toys, you can also use it during sex, even when using latex condoms. For the guys who think they’ll use their masturbators a lot, we suggest going with a larger bottle of lube like the 8oz bottle of Adam and Eve Lube. These toys are at their best when they are absolutely swimming in sex lube!

Penis Sleeve or Extender – price range $11 to $20

Now we realize that penis sleeves and extenders can be a bit of a red-light when it comes to guys using sex toys for the first time. Especially with the fellas that are less than confident about their shape or size, adding something onto the penis can just spell trouble. If you or your guy is a bit on the fence, there are unassuming versions that may be a good first step. Sleeves that add texture rather than size like the Tickler Cage may show the guy that it’s more about texture than anything else.  Silicone Superflex Stimulators can add a bit of hardness to the guy’s erection, but it’s still more about the bumpy sides than anything else. If your guy has no issue with extensions, basic starters like the Futuristic Penis Enhancer are in the right price range for guys starting out in the sex toy world.

Whether you’ve just turned 18 and never bought an adult toy in your life, or you’re an older woman who is ready to take her pleasure into her own hands, getting the basics for the first time can sometimes be confusing. With thousands of toys to choose from, what should you get? The team here at Adam and Eve suggest that these items make up your starter kit for the lady looking at sex toys for the first time.

Basic bullet vibrator – price range $10 to $20

The classic bullet vibe is a great place to start your sex toy collection. Unassuming in appearance, this small little sex toy is often easy to hide. Whether you get a single unit like the My Private O Vibrator, or a corded remote control vibrator like the Wonder Bullet, many can be used both externally on the clit or internally in the vagina. (Be sure to read your toy’s instructions first, to be sure it is designed for internal use, though!) Bullet vibrators will help you explore to see if you’re the type of woman who can get off from clitoral stimulation alone. They’re also great to use on the nipples for an added sensation during play. Since most of these beginner sex toys use either one or two batteries, you won’t need a collection to keep your toys going!

Water based sex lubricant – price range $5 to $12

The first time doing anything can be a bit nervous, causing you to ‘dry up’ down below. Water based lubricants can be used with any sex toy including those that are silicone based. If you are using condoms with your toys, the water based lubricant won’t break the materials down (unlike silicone lubes that will). Use plenty of lube when doing any sort of penetration for the first time, for a slow and steady experience. Pump-bottle lubes like the Adam and Eve Personal Lubricant are easier to control as far as amount goes, but smaller lube bottles are a bit more discreet.

Realistic dildo – $13 to $20

Here’s when we start looking at those who need penetration for their sexual release. Realistic dildos can be intimidating at first – oversized and often exaggerated penises for women who may have only seen a few in their lives (if any). Start with something that’s average shape and size. (This isn’t the time for the porn-star cast versions!) Dildos like the Beginner Ding Dong are the same size and girth as the average human penis, but in a rather friendly pink color. Flared bases on dildos may make control easier for some, while cylinder style dildos like the Classic Dong could be for others.

Non-realistic dildo – $20 to $35

There are times when a penis shaped sex toy won’t do the trick. Some ladies need their sex toys to have a greater curve in order to hit their g-spot. For some strange reason, though, these tend to be more expensive than realistic dildos! The Crystal Pleaser is a great starter dildo for those who are ready to explore their g-spots. If you’re willing to shell out more for your first g-spot dildo, look for those with a more pronounced curve like the Adam and Eve Glass G Dual Pleasure Wand. Glass sex toys like this are great for starters, as they tend to last a very long time and rarely need replacing.

I wasn’t happy at all when I was looking around and seeing that all these toys were so expensive. Beginners like me need to have a bit of variety when it comes to exploring a new fetish. What I liked about this system is that in a way, we were getting three different crops for less than $50. With a single handle, you get three different tops – the standard folded leather crop top, a heart shaped top and a hand shaped top. Each had their own thickness, so we were able to find out which style worked best for us. My wife also liked looking in the mirror after each spanking to see the various shapes of the red marks it left on her ass after she had a few whacks.

My only complaint about the Interchangeable Crop Top System is that the three crops included were all pretty much the same size, and were all quite small. On the back of the box, you can see the other separately sold tops that can fit on the handle. While there is a good variety in size and style overall, the three included in the box were a bit too similar for my liking. It would have been nice to change up the style a bit.

But at the end of the day, the main reason we got this interchangeable crop was to see if my wife would be into getting spanked with one. After a long and grueling process (said very sarcastically, mind you) we’ve decided that she’s very much into it. So I now feel more comfortable spending a bit more on spanking toys to keep the little woman smiling.

Cock rings at their most basic are a flexible ring that is rolled down the shaft of an erect penis and rests just above the scrotum. This prevents the blood that is already in the penis from leaving, resulting in a harder and longer lasting erection. For some men, this restricted blood flow also helps increase the size and thickness of their erection. Men who are apprehensive about using drugs to get themselves harder often turn to cock rings for non-medicinal aid.

Usually made from silicone, rubber, or other flexible materials, your standard cock ring is designed to fit around the average penis width. Many cock ring sets – especially basic ones like the Black Tri-Rings from Cal Exotics come in multiple sizes. This is great for guys who aren’t exactly sure which size to get, or those who want to wear one ring around their shaft, and other rings elsewhere like around their scrotum or closer to the tip of their penis.

Moving on from the basic cock ring, you start to look at those with additional features that can help take a regular missionary style sex session to the next level. A number of cock rings have attached vibrators and bunny ears (think rabbit vibrator clit stimulators) that will pleasure a woman’s clitoris during intercourse. Some have secondary phalluses so a woman can enjoy double penetration with a single partner. Many cock rings go beyond the “ring” shape and become more a sleeve or cage, ensuring a quality erection as well as additional stimulation.

So if you’re looking for a non-medical way to maintain or strengthen your erection, looking for new ways to pleasure your female partner in the bedroom, or just want something new to spice up your “adult” time, you may want to check out cock rings the next time you go browsing for sex toys at Adam and Eve online!

I had heard all the poo-pooing about it before. The cord is too short. It’s a buzzy sensation rather than a thuddy, deep vibration. It’s only got two settings. It can create the dreaded ‘disappearing orgasm’ – where you build and build and suddenly, when you’re ready to cum, the sensation is too intense and it’s over as quick as a snap. I’d also seen the face of a number of women using this toy before, and the level of ecstasy they went through is something I could only dream about. It was so powerful that you could make yourself orgasm though a pair of jeans (as in, leave them on and use it over the top). I decided to give it a try for myself.

A few days after I placed my order, the standard brown non-descript box arrived at my door. (Incidentally, do any other companies other than sex toy retailers use these boxes anymore?) Once I had a free afternoon, I took it out and had a look. This thing was HEAVY! It probably only weighs a couple of pounds at most, but when you’re used to handling smaller bullet vibes and the occasional jelly dildo – well, it’s like going from a hammer to a pneumatic nail gun. I used an extension cord so that I could lay down comfortably in my bed while testing out the toy.

Took a swig of my wine, flicked the switch and got ready for the ride.

Yes, it was buzzy – both in sound and sensation. (It was loud – something that you’re not going to get away with if you have thin walls.) Tested it over a pair of thin cotton pants and panties at first. If I was sensitive, I bet I would have cum just from that. Took a bit of getting used it when I did lay it on my bare flesh, but it was the quickest first orgasm I ever had. Certainly not squirt-worthy, but I don’t think I built up to it enough. A day later, I had another go, this time taking it slow and steady. Then came the ‘top of the lungs’ screaming orgasm I had witnessed in porn movies. After I had regained sanity shortly after coming down off the orgasmic high, I decided that while the Hitachi Magic Wand Massager was worth every penny I paid for it, it wasn’t an ‘everyday’ sex toy. For that, I’ll stick to my tiny little finger vibe!