Gwyneth Paltrow’s Open Marriage
There have been recent reports that part of the demise of Gwyneth Paltrow’s marriage to Chris Martin can be attributed to the fact that they engaged in an open marriage. No one may ever really know for sure but they seem to be getting a lot of heat about both of their alleged infidelities. But if the cheating was in fact not cheating then what is the issue? Many people will argue that open marriages are bad for relationships and for the family. That isn’t necessarily true though. I’ve found that many couples engaged in non-monogamy actually communicate better than their monogamous cohorts because they have to negotiate every detail of their relationship, from what behaviors are ok to engage in to who is an appropriate sex partner. Kids may not understand the model but it doesn’t mean it has to be detrimental to them. Some couples either handle their trysts very discreetly or if they have longer-term partners, find a way to integrate both primary and secondary partners into their family system.
Not all of us are cut out to be monogamous. I think it is unfair to push our judgment on to Gwyneth and Chris as if this is the one thing that killed their relationship. Let’s not forget that they were together a long time by Hollywood standards and that some relationships regardless of whether or not they are open, simply run their course.
Gwyneth does get a bad wrap in general as a Hollywood ice queen — someone who is holier than though. But there may be something to the fact that she was evolved enough to engage in an open marriage for so long. That perhaps they even tried it as an option in which to stay coupled. In that regard, may be she is superior to us.
image is a copyrighted photo of the models
Dr. Kat is the resident sexologist at Adam & Eve and also runs a private practice and media consulting business. She has a Doctorate from the Institute for the Advanced Study of Human Sexuality. Her professional affiliations include AASECT, SSSS, and the American Board of Sexologists. She also has a Master’s degree in Counseling Psychology and completed a postgraduate degree in Marriage, Family and Addictions Recovery Therapy.
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