My Advice on Slow or Rough Sex

Smooth, hard, or fast. I get this question a lot from men and women about what the best pace is in bed. 


But I always tell them that pace isn’t really the issue. Sex is not a relay race and the only baton you’re handing off is the one between the man’s legs. Sex isn’t a race and sex isn’t a sport – remember this. Sex is supposed to be a loving, passionate exchange between two people who love each other. If you just met in bar and you’ll say goodbye in the morning that’s fine too. But the speed and vigorousness of sex should always be something you gauge in the moment.

Some women like it when a man really pounds away. If she does, she’ll beg for it. You’ll surely run into a few issues when one likes it hard and the other likes it soft. The best option here is to talk about it. I always say you should switch off here and there – a little like you do on a long drive. Taking turns to appease your lover in sex is an important and fundamental lesson in love making.

Sex should not be a one-man show in a Podunk bar with a single audience member. Sex should be a rock concert in bed with crowd surfing, cheering and all. The way to achieve this is by deciding who gets to do what and when and coming to certain comprises. There are a host of benefits to slow and rough sex. When the moment is passionate enough and the heart is beating away perhaps harder sex is in the cards. If it’s a slow night and it’s hot outside and there’s a full moon, bring her some flowers, light some candles and gently make love to her. Smooth, hard, or fast – it doesn’t matter – do what you feel and make decisions together.

Trust me, you’ll have much better sex with firm verbal agreements.

Watch for more sex tips and advice from yours truly, Maximilian



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