Pegging Play

The term “pegging play” may elicit a few quizzical looks out there. And for good reason, it actually is a fairly new term in the sexual lexicon. It’s simply strap-on sex where a woman penetrates a man’s anus with a strap-on dildo. The term pegging became popularized by Dan Savage when we held a contest for someone to name the act of female to male penetration when he realized there was no specific term for it. Pegging was born.

The act has obviously been around for a long time but has recently become more popular among the mainstream set. It’s yet another taboo that long term couples can incorporate in their play. After all, what has been good for the geese must be good for the gander as well, yes? I’ve come up with a few pegging tips for those of you out there who want to give it a try.

Try it at Least Once

Every couple should try it at least once. It can be a whole new way to not only experience sex but may define your relationship in a new way in regards to roles. Many guys have stated that it was nice to relinquish their position as penetrator/initiator and be more passive; while many women have enjoyed their newfound power in being the penetrator.pegging

Go Slow

Just like with anal sex in general, this is not an act you want to rush. Take your time, use lots of lube and prep the man’s anus by doing some finger play or smaller vibrator/dildo play first; working his way up to an initially slender dildo to use with the strap on.

Depth and Rhythm

Allow the penetratee to control the action by communicating what works for him. Women will discover that since they cannot feel through their strap on, that it will be hard to judge how hard or deep to go. That’s why lots of open communication during the act is of the utmost importance.

Know What to Expect

His erection may get softer during penetration. This does not mean that he is not enjoying himself. When being penetrated the pelvic floor muscles are somewhat redirected and may not allow for a full erection. Other guys may want to masturbate themselves or have their female partners do a nice reach around hand job. Masturbation may also serve the purpose of redirecting the pain/pleasure response, making the experience more enjoyable and less painful overall.

You may find that watching a few pegging videos will help to give you ideas and wet his whistle, so to speak. Adam and Eve has a great selection.


 is the resident sexologist at Adam & Eve and also runs a private practice and media consulting business. She has a Doctorate from the Institute for the Advanced Study of Human Sexuality. Her professional affiliations include AASECT, SSSS, and the American Board of Sexologists. She also has a Master’s degree in Counseling Psychology and completed a postgraduate degree in Marriage, Family and Addictions Recovery Therapy.

© Copyright DrKat LLC